7/26/22: Biscuits the Stock Market Cat

Tom found that his cat, Biscuits, could predict the stock market.

At first it started as a prank on his roommate. He rigged a “buy” and “sell” button up to his robinhood account, and rewarded Biscuits with catnip scented treats after she successfully made trades. The goal was to match her performance onto his roommate’s, and prove with some faulty statistics that he was no better than their cat.

But then Biscuits started making money. Gobs and gobs of it. In less than a month, Tom was looking at an amount sufficient to wipe out his student loans. In three, he had enough to buy a house.

What was Biscuits? An Oracle? An entity maximizing for Tom’s happiness? Was this a prank?